“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb” Jeremiah 1:5

During prayer for my children and grandchildren recently, God revealed to me that I have at least three little souls in heaven that I will meet one day. It occurred to me I might have many offspring that I haven’t heard of, and won’t know the extent till I am in heaven.
I miscarried my 5th baby, my eldest daughter miscarried many, God knew them in our wombs, Wow!

The lifestyle of one of my sons in particular, could be responsible for many lost souls, I am sad to say.

Like Job I offer prayer for Gods mercy on them, for sins they commit. Job 1:5.

‘After his children feasted seven days eating and drinking he was concerned that they might have blasphemed or cursed God in their hearts. He offered up prayer and sacrifice for them.’

Like Job this particular day, I was offering prayers for anything they may have done against Him. I felt suddenly overwhelmed with grief and felt that perhaps one of my sons wives, or someone in the family might be contemplating it at this moment. How would I know?

I wept for all the children who that day, would be lost to the earth, and I prayed that none of my family were amongst them.

Of course we are responsible for our own sin, but I believe as Moses prayed for the Israelites when they faced Gods wrath, we may stay His hand for a time and intercede on their behalf.

If I truly believe from conception they are living beings, filled with Gods likeness, as each soul is, then they deserve names. God says he will give us a new name as  Rev 2:17 states. These little ones are those of which the Bible speaks, persecuted, through no fault of their own.

He gave me this prayer that morning.


To My Unborn Grandchild

I’m sorry precious baby
For the way you left the womb,

For the selfishness of Mum and Dad,who’s hearts could make no room.

Had I known of your existence, I would have fought, cried and begged,

To hold you and enclose you

And nurture you instead.

Our Father, He was crying

Your guardian did wail,

As human hands removed you

And your heart began to fail

You’re little body torn apart

Your haven now a hell

If I had known at all dear one

I would have prayed, farewell.

My Jesus held out his hands,

To take your living spirit

And into his breast he pressed you

With love that has no limit.

I know we would have loved you

And one day we will see,

Your precious unique heart and soul

When from our bodies we are free.

I love you.

Forgive them Father, they know not what they do.


How many of your family members are missing?

Posted 2013 originally.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged aborted, discarded, unwanted | Leave a reply






In my desperateness, I opened myself up

To anyone who felt they could partake,

And I mistook this for love.

In my ignorance.

I cared not for consequence,

Refused to think

Beyond myself.

In my stupidity I hid the truth


and denied

That this could be the fact.

In my pride and fear

I sought no help,

Hid my shame away.

In negligence I held you

And refused to let you go

To a loving caring home

That I could not provide.

 In my youth 

Thought that  I would be enough

And never faced tomorrow.

In deceitfulness

I kept the knowledge of your birth

From you,

Thinking that love will find a way.

But it didn’t, and the fact remains

That you will always seek a name.

A face

A place

A Dad.

So in sorrow now I miss you

In misery I cry,

I yearn for you

And cry out to a God

Who forgives my sins

But cannot change the past.


How many of your family members are missing?OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

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